I Am The Warrior…Worrier?

I am convinced that some of the wedding Websites out there are attempting to make me even MORE anxious about the big day. I recently received an email from one of the numerous sites I’ve signed up for with the subject line, “Have You Thought About Your Wedding Kiss?”

The email went on to explain that there are many little things that us brides forget to practice, which, for me, translates to all the little things we forget to worry about while we are preoccupied with worrying about the big things. I admit it. I am a worrier. My fiancé claims that it’s one of the things he loves about me (well, maybe he refers to it as “caring”). However, being a worrier and planning a wedding don’t always jive.

When I woke up three different times last night and couldn’t get back to sleep, I tossed and turned, consumed by minute details regarding the big day—Did I pick the right colors? Is Mr. Cathedral Heights ever going to look at tuxedos? Will I get so anxious walking down the aisle in front of all those people that I pass out? Is it crazy to be spending so much money on one day when I don’t even have a car? And I still have seven months of worrying to go!

I remember when my best friend and bridesmaid—I'll call her K—got married. She said something about being concerned for me when it came time to plan my wedding. She knows me very well and had the foresight to predict how my personality might clash with having hundreds of details to organize and choices to make while everyone I’ve ever known tells me what they think I should do.

After racking my brain—and my mother’s, and K’s, and my fiance’s—over the past few weeks, I came to the understanding that I need to allow myself to not worry about some of the details. I’ll focus on the big items, or the items that matter most to me, and I’ll ask for help with the other stuff (I supposed this realization seems obvious to most). I had a moment of clarity today as well, when I took a step back and looked at the big picture. We’re planning an enormous party for ourselves—a day surrounded by loved ones, celebrating our relationship, our future, and our families joining together. This should be fun!

So, no, I hadn’t thought about practicing our wedding kiss. In fact, I want it to be spontaneous (or, as spontaneous as a planned moment that happens in pretty much every similar event can be), filled with excitement and love and nerves. I’ve made a decision: I’m going to give myself permission not to worry about the kiss.

Google Calendar Saves the Day!

So I'm the kind of girl that if I don't write something down, it's in one ear and out the other. Though somehow I seem to retain every piece of useless knowledge I've ever heard, which makes me absolutely deadly in Trivial Pursuit.

In the last couple months I started forming this running lists of things in my head, random things, the kinds of things that keep you awake at 3am in the morning. I knew I needed to write them down, but I needed more than that. I needed to organize all these little ideas and tasks so I could see when things needed to happen and when to do them in relation to all the 8 million other little tasks. Basically, I needed to come up with a foolproof way of avoiding "I was tying ribbons on my programs at 4am the night before my wedding...haha!" syndrome.

I finally hit on it: My Google calendar. I can enter all those little tasks, when I want to get them done, and see when my "deadlines" are looming. Extra points for being web-based and accessible from my home AND office, I can't lose or misplace it. Hurrah!

Here I've got all our upcoming Sunday School/Wedding Prep classes, all the days Crate &Barrel has their special registry parties, the upcoming Paper Source FREE wedding workshop and a florist appointment!

Every time I think of something I open up my Google calendar and add it. I've noted the day we're in the 60-day window to get our marriage license, the last possible day Mr. Fairfax is allowed to get a haircut (yes, there is a moratorium on haircuts within two weeks of the wedding), when we should mail the Save The Dates, when final payments are due. There's even a reminder to get my ring cleaned (Wednesday before), a note on the last day I can possibly get my brows waxed, and a reminder to shave my legs (yes, otherwise I would be stepping into my dress realizing I HADN'T SHAVED MY LEGS).

I also took advantage of the Spreadsheet feature in Google docs to get into the detailed tasks that can't even be calendared yet. Things like, "decide if I want copper lanterns or silver lanterns for table center-pieces," and "call florist and ask what type of ribbon can be used on bouquets,"
or "save more jars for flower arrangements."

I can happily report that now I'm getting all this stuff down in one place, I'm sleeping much better at night...except for the wedding nightmares which kicked in right after Christmas, but that's a story for another time.

How are you keeping track of the little details?

Wedding Day Must!

There is one thing I absolutely know I will be doing on my wedding day (besides getting married) and it's not what you're thinking: getting make-up done, taking first look pictures, putting a garter on. Though I'll certainly be doing all of that. The one thing I really don't want to forget and is my wedding day must is...ordering in lunch!

If there's no time for a sit-down lunch the day of, eating seems to be one little detail that is forgotton on the wedding day! In fact, I just read on a friends recap on her wedding blog about running around in Safeway between her hair and make-up appointments "scavenging for food!" I can be a less than pleasant individual when I'm hungry...don't want to be a grumpy bride!

I think having some sandwiches and drinks delivered for the girls to the Hendry House about noon sounds delicious. Any suggestions for some good carry-out in Arlington?